March 24, 2016
She’s a Man-Eater
Things have gotten a bit out of control! I’ll admit it’s my fault, but somehow that doesn’t seem to make it any less soul-crushing.
Let me explain: You know Praying Mantises? How the female will sometimes bite the males head off, literally, during the mating process?
Yeah that’s what my to-do list has been doing to me for weeks now!
I make a list. A good list too. There’s a lot there -more than I’d like- but it’s important stuff. The type of tasks, I know I’ll feel better if they’re finished.
I get all excited! I’m going to accomplish some much needed progress. Time to TCB. Gonna get stuff done!
Then, next thing I know, CHOMP! Stupid list takes off my head. The tasks start getting dizzily more complicated. More to-do’s seem to come out of no where, piling on. All the while, I feel like I’m scrambling around without my head on my shoulders, disorganized, disorientated, and frantically trying to get anything done to stop the bleeding.
So much for pillow talk after.
Getting Past Your Killer To-Do List
We all have one, right? At some time, perhaps often, you also have had a to-do list that feels straight out of a Stephen King novel. The responsibilities we contain within our lives can feel overwhelming.
My current list isn’t full of throw away tasks. I’m talking dreaded taxes -how in the world did my HSA get over-funded, and how do I fix this new issue? I’m talking time sensitive wedding planning, (which may seem less serious, but I don’t want a certain special someone actually decapitating me!) I’m talking health care decisions, bills, financials, ect ad nauseam.
It’s easy to start feeling run down. Especially if a large amount of tasks on our lists are actions we do not want to do, or make us feel uncomfortable. It becomes too difficult to look at that brick wall and decide to charge into it again.
So when someone tells you to follow your dreams, pursue you passion, or do something that excites you, it seems a little ridiculous.
You want me to do what? Now? As well to get up from the boardroom table, go sit on the ground in the corner, and begin “ohming” in meditation! It’s going to go over really well.
How do I even justify taking time to do something I want, when I have so much that needs done?
Isolating the Game-Changers in Your List
This article isn’t really about how to optimize your to-do lists, but it’s the best way I can’t think of to illustrate why and when you have to put you list to the side.
There should only be two types of actions that go on your high priority to-do list.
- Obligations
- Optimizers
Obligations
These are the actions, usually time sensitive, that must be done. And they must be done by you. Be selective here. We only have so much time available. The threshold for “must” needs to be high. The deciding factors for “by you” include cost of having someone else do it, shared responsibility with family and friends, and personal knowledge or skill level involved. However, letting other people do things for you is often, cheaper, easier, and more effective than you think. Recognize when you are just being afraid to let loose of your grip on the reigns.
Optimizers
These are the actions that make other tasks quicker, easier, or unnecessary. They are the game-changers. If we do them, or get them set up, everything changes for the better.
In fact, these items should usually be give priority over the other task unless something is very time sensitive.
We need to give priority to these, because accomplishing these is the difference between working with power tools, or a hand saw.
Sometimes these are the development of a system to help you accomplish your tasks more smoothly. Sometimes it’s using, or setting up a piece of technology. Sometimes it’s about organization. Sometimes it’s about drive.
However, it’s always about the question: Will doing this make my other tasks quicker, easier, of unnecessary?
Finding the Game-Changers in Your Life
So the realm of to-do lists is broken down into obligations, and optimizers. Well life can often times be thought of, or broken down the same way.
We have our life obligations, which now are the entire to-do list (it’s obligations, and optimizers). And we have our life optimizers.
Stay with me, because here’s where I get really excited.
These life optimizers aren’t about fueling particular tasks we need to accomplish. They are about making the whole list easier. They are about making your whole life easier!
These are the real game-changers. These are the things that if we succeeded in would change our whole lives for the better, in ways we usually can’t completely anticipate. They are our dreams, our passions, and the ideas that excited us.
And not the little dreams, the ones that would change everything! The type of change that would turn life upside down from what it’s like now. The dreams would make you excited to get up in the morning. The changes that would make you feel energized throughout the day. The excitement that would counter the stress in your life.
What would it be like to lose 20 lbs (or what ever amount makes the difference to you), and feel strong, mobile, and energized? What would it be like to recondition your work environment, so that you enjoy being at work? What would it be like to write, fuel your creativity, and be heard?
That’s what I did. Writing allows me a creative outlet mostly lacking in my professional work. It gives me something missing, and as a result my whole life, professional, and private feel more fulfilling. Writing this now takes my mind off that cannibalistic to-do list. More importantly though, it relaxes, and excites me! I feel ready to take on that monster again, when I’m finished here.
Try to Justify Not Doing It
How can I justify taking the morning out to write, when I feel buried under a mountain of responsibilities? How on earth could I justify not doing it!?
Optimizers are the magic that pick up that mountain, and shakes the dirt off of you so you can stand, and breath again.
Your game-changers are your own. I don’t know what’s inside of you. I don’t know what will turn your world upside down. So ask yourself, what would change it all? What would make you excited to be alive every day. What would make you feel energized? What would make you feel better?
Most likely it too seems scary. It’s probably overwhelming in it’s own way.
However, how can you justify not pursuing this?
Find that thing that would change it all for you. You won’t feel like you need permission to pursue it!
Venture to Dream
-Michael Speck