November 29, 2013

All rested up?

Time to get stuck in a loop!

Some people  live their lives believing that everything is connected. There are no coincidences, and everything happens for a reason. Some attribute the reason to a god or a religion. Some believe in karma, and still others just prefer to think the universe is ordered that way. Other people live their lives believing that reality is a chaotic randomness. That there is no order, and no reason. No god, and no supernatural or just plain natural under-the-surface accounting for our actions. Good people do good things and are never rewarded. Good people do bad things and never suffer. However, which ever side you lean to -whatever your own internal reality- there is one way that our actions are connected to the consequences, and that has a very real impact on just that- your own internal reality.

Our own, individual, personal realities are a thing, I think, of extraordinary beauty. It is the reality you experience through the filter of all your perceptions and life experiences. It is the only reality you actually have EVER experienced, and the most amazing part to me is that it is a reality that only you will ever experience. It is unique only to you. We have many shared realities. We may enjoy a wonderful thick steak marinated in malbec, with a sautéed whole portobello cap, surrounded by pasta in a mushroom cream reduction, topped with a balsamic drizzle (yeah I made that!). We may sit by the fire, watching the flames lick the hot air and breathe faint smoke up into the chimney. We may listen the words of each other, and exchange conversation in mutual interaction. However, only you can experience how that tasted, felt, made you feel, made you think, made you react, and so much more!

I said “made you” a lot there. Many people will tell you that nothing and no one can “make” you do anything. Perhaps they are right, or at least if you concentrate hard enough. However for most people, their life experiences have a noticeable impact on them. It makes us feel good when we buy a new pair of leather shoe (maybe not our feet though).  We feel good about ourselves when we complete a workout. We feel more generous with our time and money when we have had a good day, and as a result we feel even better when people thank us simply with warm smiles and brightness in their eyes. There may be reason to refuse to let a crazy driver, who cut you off, “make” you have a bad day. However, it is important to use the life tools you have available, and that means allowing the good experiences in your life make you feel better.

It gets even better though, because letting those life experiences positively impact your internal reality remolds it to desire and accept more positive experiences. Maybe you are feeling down, or lazy, or worn out, but you muster up the resolve to take a  morning walk out in the sunshine. You feel a little more energetic and upbeat, which gives you the gumption to tackle a few of those to-do list items that have been nagging you for months. In turn you feel relieved and relaxed not to have those in the back of your mind weighing down on you. When you turn on the TV for lunch, the corny sitcom seems so much funnier, and you laugh into your living room. Smiling at the day now, you decide to go to the market to buy groceries for a proper dinner, and for some reason actually enjoy the process of cooking it. The real nutrition gives your body strength and stamina, and, after enjoying a pleasant evening reading, your mind feels light as you drift into sleep.

Sound far-fetched? Too good or easy to be true? Maybe. It’s not magic. You still have to act on those impulses. You still have to do things that are good for you, and make you happy. However, if you can just do one small thing that you know has made your day better in the past, it will cascade upon itself.  And if in the middle something unsavory happens, then don’t let it “make” you feel bad. The rest of the time, let it touch your internal reality. Dance with it and enjoy it. Whether everything is connected, or completely independent of other things, there is one thing that is inoperably connected to your internal reality: itself. Your beautiful and unique internal reality can knock you down, or it can build you up. Use it to your advantage because it is both cause and effect and cause and effect and cause and effect and cause and… !!! … sorry folks, I think I got stuck in a loop there. You should try to too.

-Michael Speck