February 25, 2016
Cultivating a spirit of adventure, and excitement is a game changer. It changes the way we see and interact with other people. It changes how we see and understand ourselves. Mostly it just makes life better! Here are five of the lessons I’ve learned by being more open to adventure.
Trust in the Kindness of Others, Even Strangers Will Help You More than You Think
When Greta Matos began dreaming her expedition of riding horses 1800 km across Patagonia with her husband and two dogs, a lot of scary details were still just in the abstract.
That’s the way it is when even reaching the beginning of the story is a an adventure in itself.
“We didn’t originally plan to hitchhike the Carretera Austral, but by doing so we opened ourselves entirely to the kindness of strangers- and they showed up without delay,” Greta writes.
They didn’t plan on asking a remote radio station to help them in the search for the 3 horses they would need either, but they did. After 1200 km of hitchhiking, then they focused on finding the horses to get back! And how? By doing what seems natural to Greta, preparing for anything, and trusting in the kindness of others.
If Greta doesn’t have an adventurous spirit worth following, no one does!
[You should really check out Greta’s story at Wanderwithgreta.com]
Trust
It seems crazy when you pick the idea apart that it is “adventurous” to trust in other people. We feel so frail, and have become so obsessed with clawing at any bit of control that simple trusting in other human beings seems as daunting as stepping over a ledge, and hoping we can fly.
I’m with you- trust is way hard. However, without trust I would have never stayed in the Netherlands with a man I’d only be introduced to once, receiving personal tours the whole time. Heck, without trusting the advice of a woman I’ve never met, I wouldn’t have had the courage to even go on that solo trip across two foreign countries alone.
At home we feel like everyone is out to get us, or competing against us at least.
On the road, every encounter feels like a chance to make a friend, and relish in the love that is the human spirit.
People with an adventurous spirit, quickly learn that if you show people that spirit, and show them kindness, they will move the world for you.
Some Experiences Will Make You Want to Tear Your Hair Out- the Good Ones Anyway
Well that’s a good sign, I thought sarcastically as I walked out of the large visitor center, and back past the train station on my way into Baden Baden. They don’t even know where my hotel is!
They tried, I’ll give them that, and were very friendly. However, I left feeling very much like the directions they gave me were guesses at best. Soon enough I decided they weren’t even their best guess.
With my luggage clunking down the stone payment behind me, I decided to approach a grandmotherly looking lady. “Wo ist das Hotel Zur Altstadt?” I asked again, hoping she would know where my hotel was.
Oh did she! With a smile she rattled off a series of what I only assume were directions, as I quickly decided my high school German classes were not up to snuff. I phrased a few more questions, and she went on again. This time with pointing. I understood just enough to get me about two more blocks down the road. Frau Sweat would be so ashamed of me!
Half an hour of walking later… still no hotel. However, there was new hope. I passed a local real estate agency with big signs on their windows that read “We Speak English!” Whoa! Real estate and English- things were about to turn around!
…and around, and around, and around in an endless series of circles. Turns out that while absolutely happy to help, they had never heard of the Hotel Zur Altstadt, and another half hour of searching led me to believe that was a very bad sign. Worry, anxiety, and frustration crept in, especially as the sun began to get lower.
Lost never feels good, but I have found that it feels worse in foreign countries! Where the hell was this place?
Finally… finally, I found an ally with the street name I’d been looking for! And then a sign “Hotel Zur Altstadt” home sweet home.
Challenging Experiences Are the Ones worth Having
Some experiences are nerve wrecking. If you are traveling with people, arguments erupt. If you are by yourself, it’s just a long period of grumbling and self-flagellation.
However, I learned to realize that is good sign. It means there was something to overcome. It provides for accomplishments. I’m not saying to go looking for frustration, but when it comes except it as par for the course.
I was wandering around a strange city in Germany, what did I think was going to happen?
Sometimes it’s not going to work out the way you planned. That’s ok. You’ll make it anyway.
Take Pictures Not Phone Calls
When I was a kid, and camping I was always told “Take nothing, but pictures. Leave nothing, but footprints.”
I have a new motto, “Take pictures, not phone calls. Leave footprints where you are, and home where you left it!”
Hopefully by now you know the 3 Steps to Feeling Refreshed after Vacation Instead of Exhausted, but in case you’ve missed it, step one is turn off your phone. [Gasp!]
Traveling is like living a symphony, or eating a gourmet dinner: There are going to be lots of subtle nuances to be found and enjoyed, but you have to focus on the experience. Making ourselves available to the plethora of problems, and circumstances back home dull, and alter our experience.
Take time to experience the world differently than you have before. Because these lessons like trusting more, and being ok when life is frustrating, these insights only come when we give ourselves the opportunity to be removed from “normal life” and see the world with fresh eyes.
It’s not easy. We miss home. We worry about “something” happening. However, you wanted to go on a trip, and see a different world, or live a different lifestyle, if only for a while. Don’t rob yourself of that. Enjoy a pure experience.
People with an adventurous spirit know that moms, and dads, husbands, and wives… facebook, they’ll all be there when you get back.
Sit There for a While
The sun broke through the red, and yellow leaves over head to form golden freckles across the ground. Katie, and I causally followed the path. The path followed the stream. We stopped at a break in the trees, where large soft stone ledges extended out into the water.
I walked to the middle and sat down about a foot over the surface, water rushing around me, and over a small fall. I don’t how long I sat- 15-30 minutes maybe- and I don’t know what Katie did -sit down on the shore I assume. What I do know is exactly how far across the stream those red and yellow leave could be and still break toward me and over the fall rather that continue downstream another way.
For that time I sat listening to the gentle rush of the water, seeing it leap over the fall, carrying the scattered leaves with it.
It was peaceful. I was happy.
Take the Time to Feel What You Are Seeing
Having an adventurous spirit, doesn’t mean always being in a rush. It means loving the experience of taking in new experiences. To do that we need to be able to actually take in the experience. Part of this is turning off phones, and outside contact. However, that’s not enough.
We need to take the time to feel what we are seeing.
Have a seat. Watch a sunset. Watch the water. Notice the colors, the curves, and nuances. Practice at first by pretending to study it. How would you describe it? What characteristics do you notice?
Then relax into it. How do you feel? Shift your focus from “What is it’s place in the world?” to “What is mine?”
Listen. Most places, there are birds around you. When is the last time you remember hearing them?
Feel. The sun may feel warm, or hot. The breeze may feel cooling, or cold. But it feels like something.
Take the time to let the world come together for you.
Do Something Alone
“Hallo. Wie gehts?” the waitress greeted me on the outside patio of a small cafe, asking how I was.
“Hallo. Gut. Ich spreche nur ein bisschen Deutch,” I replied, quickly explaining my failures as a student of German.
“Oooh, Hello!” she smiled warmly.
It was a beautiful evening in Baden Baden, if a little cool, and after pointing to order, I sat in my haven along side the town square. It was 6 or 7 pm, and all manner of people passed by. Some heading to dinner, others returning, and still more on their way out. People passed in suits, or bright dresses, and jeans, or more causal attire.
The fountain that sat in the square bubble up and over, endlessly, as the sun set, leaving street lights to guide the night.
My waitress would come, and we would chit-chat. But mostly I relaxed, content to watch the world go by in this little Black Forest town.
Alone at Last
Being alone strikes us as dauntingly as trusting others. I think for the same reasons. Maybe we don’t trust ourselves. Maybe we feel judged by others, for not having company. Having the nerve to believe in yourself, and to feel comfortable in your own skin is not an easy task.
However, embracing being alone may be perhaps the most integral part of an adventurous spirit.
Ever since I started traveling abroad, I’ve seen that cultivating a spirit of adventure, and excitment has changed the way I experience life. However, having been many years since last traveling alone, it wasn’t till recently reading Allie Mazon’s account of how traveling alone to South America changed her life, that I remembered just how important the “alone” part is.
Which isn’t even to say it needs to be a whole trip alone. Being alone for a while conditions us to be confident in ourselves. Whether a trip, a dinner, or an afternoon watching the park, being alone gives us time for personal conversations with ourselves. It is the time that we get to know ourselves.
We may think we already do. We are wrong.
As silly as it may sound not to know everything about yourself already, we don’t. Why else do people feel emotions like “I don’t know exactly what my dreams are,” “I don’t know exactly what I want,” “I’m not sure what I’m passionate about.”
We don’t know, because we’ve forgotten to take the time to get to know ourselves.
Call to Action
Take time to invest in yourself. First by heading over the read Greta’s amazing story at Wanderwithgreta.com.
And secondly, by signing up for my newsletter below to receive weekly life lessons for people with an adventurous spirit!